


Saying Goodbye

by Valeeeera



Category: Dragon Age (Video Games), Dragon Age II
Genre: Angst, Character Death, Cordelia Rae Hawke, Depressing, Drabble, F/M, Fenris comforts, Fenris is Bad at Feelings, Hurt/Comfort, Little bit of Fluff, Sad, got sad at 3 am and made this, leandra death, lost of a parent
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-24
Updated: 2018-12-24
Packaged: 2019-09-26 04:21:06
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,034
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17134850
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Valeeeera/pseuds/Valeeeera
Summary: It was that damn city, it was bloody fucking Kirkwall, it chewed up and spit out anything that breathed. And right now, Hawke was its regurgitated meal.My rendition of Leandra's death scene, thought we could use some more angst.Music inspo: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-gmd1HVGBzk





	Saying Goodbye

“I love you… You’ve always made me so proud.”

“Fuck, Mom, please…” Hawke pleaded, her voice began to tremble.

_Oh Maker, please, please, please. Not her, anyone but her._

Hawke’s breath hitched in her throat.

_They’re all gone._

_Mom. Dad. Beth. Carver._

**_It’s all my fault._ **

That was the final straw, for Hawke. Another reminder of her failures. It broke the dam, heart-wrenching sobs filled that evil basement. It started off as a choked up plead.

“Oh, Mother. I’m so, sooo sorry.” She cried as she held her Mother, like that could fix anything.

_I should’ve done better. I should’ve been there._

She looked over her shoulder at her friends, Fenris, Varric, Aveline, like she was expecting someone to fix this. Her tear-stained cheeks were blotchy, and her eyes were already bloodshot.

All she got was empathetic looks, even Aveline began shedding tears.

_Oh Mother, please, let this be a dream._

Her stomach constantly churned, and her chest ached, it hurt so much to lose Father… But Maker, not her Mother. She lost a best friend in Bethany, a baby brother in Carver, and now… Hawke pulled her Mother in closer and began to rock, her shoulders trembling with pain.

“Oh, Hawke…” Breathed Varric, he placed his hands over his mouth and watched his best friend die slowly in front of him. His heart ached for his Hawke, he could blame it on himself, hell, he could try to blame it on anyone. But he knew, everyone knew, it was that damn **city.**

It was bloody fucking **_Kirkwall_** , it chewed up and spit out anything that breathed. And right now, Hawke was its regurgitated meal.

She didn’t deserve this; the Hawke’s didn’t deserve this. Hawke was a beaming _fucking_ light for this damned city, she cleaned up everyone’s messes and all this city could do was throw it back in her face.

Aveline crept towards her dear, old friend. Her heart ached just as bad, because that day, she too felt like she lost her own mother. Aveline has seen the Hawke’s through it all, and she knew this day would come. She knew the day would come where the only Hawke left in this city would be Cordelia.

As Aveline knelt beside her, she found herself crying along with her. Her hand gently rubbed Hawke’s back as she cooed and shushed Hawke. No amount of words could fix this, but, the least Aveline could do was comfort her.

She pulled Hawke into a small hug, her arms covering her shoulders.

“I’m so sorry, Cordelia, I really am.” Pleaded Aveline, her eyes trailing off to Leandra’s corpse.

_That bastard_ , was all Aveline could think of.

“Oh A-Ave, I should’ve known better,” Hawke sobbed, “I-I should’ve known.” She pleaded, her bloodshot eyes meeting Aveline’s.

“Hawke, how could’ve you have known?” Aveline asked, her voice so quiet.

All Hawke could do was close her eyes, tears spilling out of them, and place her forehead against her Mother’s.

Fenris didn’t feel or know much, you could say he had a nice tall wall that surrounded him. But, if there was one person who could get inside or cause him to break it down for them, it’d be Hawke. He’d seen Hawke cry, he was there on those dark nights where she was reminded of a long-lost sibling or a dead one; he comforted her, but not in the way you’d expect. Those nights were filled with empty promises and sex, and he let himself get caught up in her. And now, it was too late, because he started to feel what Hawke felt. He felt remorseful, maybe if he wasn’t so caught up in his petty bullshit – no, it didn’t matter. That wouldn’t had fixed anything, no one saw this coming.

His chest ache, a familiar feeling, but this time it felt deeper. It made its way into his stomach and into every joint into his body. Who knew seeing Hawke like this would do this to him, he didn’t know.

Aveline flashed that infamous glare over her shoulder, her cheeks red as the blood that flowed through them. They both knew what it meant, and they could hear Aveline now;

_You dumb selfish bastards, help her._

Fenris somberly walked over, his hands clenched at his side. He knelt down beside Hawke and Aveline took her leave. Instinctively, he wrapped his arm around her waist and pulled her close. Hawke looked up, her face a mess. Tears mixed with makeup that stained her face, her bright blue eyes so bloodshot and puffy he wondered how they were even open. And for one of the first times ever, Fenris realized how much Cordelia meant to him. If he could leave a pool of blood behind him just to fix this, he’d do it in a heartbeat. He thought of an invisible army he could wipe out that would fix this all – but, he knew better than anyone, this kind of grieve was incurable.

“I’m sorry, Hawke. Perhaps, we should leave.” He whispered to her, not entirely sure what to say. And like magic, all Hawke did was nod along to him. Looking down at her mother, she placed one last kiss on her forehead and laid her down gently.

Fenris pulled her up and into his chest, running his fingers through her dark, matted locks.

“I wish I could fix this, Delia. But, I don’t think I can.” He relented.

Hawke nodded and looked up at him, her bottom lip quivering. He’s never seen so much pain on someone’s face before, and it hurt to see it in his Hawke.

“F-Fenris, I want to go home.”

He nodded and pulled her staff off her back, dropping it behind her, and gently scooped her up. He held her close as she laid her head against his chest, he wondered if she was comfortable. It probably didn’t matter to her though, at least she could feel something, he thought. Fenris looked back to Varric and Aveline, the two of them conversing amongst themselves.

Varric shooed him away and looked back at Leandra’s body. It was time for him to take care of Hawke, like she did for all of them.

**Author's Note:**

> I don't own Dragon Age, especially Dragon Age 2. But if I did, Fenris would feel more.


End file.
